Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
Unmistakable female orgasm noises coming from upstairs shower
She must've brought a toy -- seriously doubt that he's up to the task
Dude..TWLOHA day. gonna write LOVE on my arms before going to the bar tonight. its like a pussy guarantee.
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
Just got an email from TMobile. Said they were going to pursue "more qualified" candidates. So this is what rock bottom feels like.
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
She's a virgin AND a minister's daughter. We're one schoolgirl outfit from the dear penthouse trifecta
I have your car and your sandals. My shoes are somewhere under the puke couch. Safari time.
A black suburban rolled up and a scary suited guy got out the passenger side and opened the door for her as she got in. Then drive off. Who did I just fuck?
He walked into the pizza shop... Pulled the fire alarm.. And proceeded to dance to it...
Last year you twerked on my Christmas tree and threw up all over the bathroom...in front of my parents. We should probably keep power hour to ONLY an hour this year
Just walked past the field playing Jesus music with a fanny pack full of condoms and beer. Happy Sunday.
woke up. showered n got ready. had sex. and was still 15 minutes early to work... its gonna be a good day!
Day drunk. He was sitting in the back seat, opened the door, leaned out, and peed right there in the dutch bros drive through. No one even noticed haha
I boned my sugar daddy for the first time yesterday and now I know why they say guys in their 40s are the best. Also I’m getting a car.
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