So ignoring my calls doesnt work if you update your facebook a minute later.
She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
He wanted to put Kesha on after he came in my mouth. I had to draw some sort of trashy, gay line.
CONGRATS VODKA, YOU WON RHIS TIME..
You did a strip tease for the toilet.
No, this is non-alcoholic oatmeal.
Drag queen told me that I have the cheek bones to do drag. That's supposed to boost my moral.
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
My mom said she saw you at the bar last night and asked how you were. She said, you replied with, "Oh you know, just knocked up."
Figured I'd get right to the point
I'm the only one who goes to a bar and leaves with an extra twenty bucks and a pumpkin.
I'm sure he'll make the rejection quick and completely justified.
Definitely woke up.this morning to a random girls head in my toilet and her mom knocking on my door.
nyquil+orgasm=very intense and oddly interesting
half way down the stairs my legs said fuck this and i just fell the rest of the way...
I could not add him. He gets 5 likes on Instagram.
Randomize
