Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
I don't think anyone has ever said "boy I'm glad I took those shots of everclear" when they wake up
just got my girl scout cookies. wanna get high?
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
Good ideas don't start with we have a bottle of vodka..
The drunk teletubby stumbling out of the place tipped me off..
I swear after i took it all i did was scream for four hours
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
i threw up in his garden in front of like five people smoking a joint. they let me have a hit after i was done so it was okay
I have to pee in a cup in the morning and they are going to say....you just peed a miller light. I'm going to hang my head in shame and say yes...yes I did.
How the fuck am I supposed to enjoy a third ice day from school if I only bought enough alcohol for 2?
I don't know, maybe act like an adult who teaches children for a living
It's like we're not even friends
He asked me how flexible I was and all I could think about was that time I threw my back out putting in a tampon.
Spent tonight painting strippers in camo.
All I remember is being lured out to sit by the fire by you holding a piece of pizza in front of me
I'm at home 4 xanax deep watching She's all that.. no I don't want to go out. The couch is eating me.
Randomize
