you always know who the new freshman are on fb because theyre always wearing prom dresses
This last weekend single handedly took me off the liver transplant list
Put your dick on his face to wake him up, dont worry its fine.
the more i look through evidence of last night, the less i seem to remember.
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
Best part of failing a semester of college: not having to buy books next semester. I can drink to that
I'm soaked in beer, and I think blood. Why did we think we could tap a keg with a hammer?
We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt.
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us
I just had a flashback to the three of us in the bed and me shouting AM I THE BIGGEST OR LITTLEST SPOON?!
Fuck romance. Just shaved my nipples in the shower because I felt like it. That's the life I'm about.
I mean, he drove your car and it burst into flames, if anyone cant be trusted, it's him.
Who knew that showing someone your boobs would make them stop crying.
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
He’s got a big dick and a big ego. This could be fun
Randomize