four days late. damn you, makeup sex. you win again.
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
I really want to title the album "I want to make sex with your face" but I also want a job someday. Temptations, temptations.
All I know is that we apparently made a drink we named The Single Girl which is rum, vodka, grain alcohol, and sprite and rolled around in the backyard.
It's one of those days where you order the free Papa John's pizza so the delivery guy can bring you Coke to go with your rum. The tip was more than the order.
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
She sprained her ankle last night trying to flash me.
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
What if for Halloween I paint my self gold and make sandwiches for everyone? I'd be a trophy wife! Get it?
We went camping and met these lesbians and now I have S'mores where there shouldn't be S'mores.
2016 shall be rememered as the year I sharted while putting up the Christmas tree.
His wife just cheated on him for the third time. I'm his first extra-marital fling, that makes it ok, right? You know to keep karma balanced in the universe
Your logic is flawless...
dude, where did you go? french fries taste like numbers
Randomize
