I just realized I used lady gaga lyrics in my research paper on marie antoinette
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
The last memory I have is vomiting into a box and her rubbing my back saying "you are such a trooper..."
It involved homemade coconut rum, a waterfall, and street signs. I'll leave the rest to your capable imagination.
Remember when I booked a hotel room for next sat? Nneither do I.
next time we drink: battle shots.
battle shots or battle shits? if its the first, explain. if its the second I think I figured it out.
I know my whole body feels like I belly flopped onto concrete. Seriously need to tone it down for a while
Well I'm going to San Francisco next weekend for pride. I'm sure I'll end up drunk and on a beach at some point.
Listen man, there's two things I know about in life: porn and sound. On a day that I'm wearing khakis, I need you to trust that I know what the fuck I'm doing.
He won't leave and I need to take a shit and vomit, quite possibly at the same time.
He broke into my house because he missed me. Then ends the relationship because I'm the needy one. Ironic much?
BRING KITTENS I AM A GENIUS
You know I base where I go on the likelihood of me getting laid there. This includes work.
I fucked that choir dude last night. he had the most strangely musical moans. it was like a Sound Of Music porno.
he bought me ice cream then took me home and fucked the shit outta me. you can't write this kinda romance.
Randomize
