do you remember how we all fit in that bathtub?
tequila
My bra smells like weed because there's weed in my bra
You know how I know he's a virgin? He's wearing transition lenses.
did i walk over a car last night?
He apologized for his naked psychotic episode and then we had goodbye sex on his sailboat
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
Puked up what appears to be battery acid next to the treadmill. Everyone noticed.
i'm about to tell me dad "sorry staying in isnt an option. i'm fucking a marine tonight."
I think I ate my cheesy fiesta potatoes cup.
if i dont text back till morning its cause i turned my phone off and changed my password to something i wont remember to stop myself from drunk texting...RESPONSIBILITY
Well I'm going to hell. But I'm going after multiple orgasms.
Can we make love to the Space Jam soundtrack?
I'm 4,715,723% sure I don't give a fuck.
Why the fuck are you playing with legos?
Why the fuck are you questioning me?
We’re leaving where are you
Hold on Toxic just started playing
Randomize
