I think I speak chipmunk. Odd.
Are you high?
No. That's why it's odd
Her underwear doesnt even match. If youre going to be a face book whore at least have matching shit.
Our cab driver just admitted to beating up kids in the 60's who didn't smoke pot...
he was fingering me, then looked down and said "i like your socks"
she was eating donuts out of the garbage. enough said.
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
I vaguely remember having a cowboy explain his belt buckle to me in the bathroom hallway
EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
It sucks laughing and vomiting at the same time, trust me. I kind of remember
I want to preface this by saying nothing happened, nothing is on fire. It is mere speculation. Do we have a fire extinguisher?
Ryan Reynolds is on sesame street right now. Dressed as a letter A but still sexy as fuck. PBS is so considerate of the stay at home mom.
If I don't get to have sex with him soon my entire female reproductive system is gonna climb out of my body and choke me to death
So high that I just walked into class, late, sat down in my desk, and tried to buckle my seatbelt.
Hey do you remember me?
You were the giant banana I had sex with... how could i forget?
Fuck you bitch. You're married. You got a live-in dick at home for your needs. I still gotta surf this shitty town's bars for cock
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