Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
Your remote is drenched in lotion and you expect me to believe you weren't masturbating?!
They invented the twister shot game. You put a shot on each circle, take it when you land on it, and if you fall, they funnel the mat and make you drink it. New best friends.
Well sundance is in town and Im going to use my one and only shot to bang Taylor swift... Does it count as a random if shes famous?
Male strippers are involved. You are coming
We told you to go get more fire wood and you came running back with a log that was on fire, not drunk at all.
I JUST WATCHED PAULA DEEN PUT BUTTER IN HER BLOODY MARY. This is not a drill. Real life.
I haven't been sober in 4 days.
Then be sober
No.
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
I discovered a new stretch mark. DONE. LITERALLY DONE.
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
Wow two curved penises in one weekend. I feel like this may be good luck. Like finding a four leaf clover
i woke up this morning wearing my pants as a scarf and my shirt as a daiper, my boyfriends contact name in my phone is "human sacrifice" and yours is "i like eggs"....can someone please tell me what happened last night
Fuck you. Fuck this party. I just wanted to be pretty with a cute little tiara and boys sucking my tits, now i have a hangman game drawn on my face and jello shots in my hair.
I wanted to give you a great birthday party. You know I did.
Randomize
