I never want to see another naked old woman again.
The sky will open, cue choir of angels: "oh! wow! Matt was right! Not only will I grow out my bush, but I'm going to date straight, available men!"
Her parents hate her and she's on like major lockdown. All her friends are in jail and she has massive pit stains. Dude... It doesn't get much worse than that.
i just went through and liked all 1,239 of her pictures instead of writing my english paper. don't tell her, i want her to be surprised
the towel caught on fire outside the hottub but we were all too stoned to care
Just topless shotgunned a bud light alone. I am about to peer mentor the shit out of these freshmen.
I was also standing on my bed with a road cone pounding on the ceiling at 3am. Not sure why
I forgot to tell you thank you for putting me out when I was on fire. im sure I'll laught about this someday...
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
oh wow I have been there. Hell one time Matt and I woke up naked with pizza rolls in the bed.
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
Whiskey and an unstable home life is apparently the fountain that 20-something boys like to drink from.
I feel like parents watching our children. You want to step in and help them but you just have to let them make their mistakes
Can you please explain to me why there are 7 bags of tacos in my bed?
But of course I'm in. After all, what fun would the holidays be without trying to find the perfect gift to impress someone you've never met, but need the approval of??
Randomize
