You are an awful beat friend I am goin to die in a car accident and then my corpse is going to be used by criminals ala weekend at bernies to rob a bank then my corpse will go to jail Thanks john Thanks for nuthin
the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
I just fired a shotgun out of the back of a truck going 60. i am going to miss oregon.
Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
Between the two of us weve fucked every guy at this table
You think they'd ask my permission before turning Pajamarama into an orgy. I saw too many of my friends dicks at once the door got kicked down.
Do you remember giving me altiods and wishing me good luck on the walk home?
I tried to explain to the cop how we all have skeletons in our closets but he just wouldn't listen.
Hey..um, you dont know me, but I just found your purse in a bush at the end of my street this morning
I'm watching sex and the city with my wine and Wendy's. I'm not sure if this is single woman empowerment or not.
My nerves will need dicks later so.. I'll call you
I want you more than I want a burrito.
I'm not as filling.
I'm gonna try and get through this weekend sober, which is gonna be tough especially since I've already started drinking.
Oh, do you remember telling everyone you were with that your vagina was angry last night?
He’s perfect! He listens to Genesis during sex and has a VW bus!
You really are from the panhandle, aren’t you?
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