is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
Is showing up wearing the condom a bit presumptus
She told me to "stuff her hole like a build-a-bear". I was so drunk I didn't even think that was weird.
Two hours into move in day and the ambulance is here already.
He dodged my hug and greeted me with a fist bump. I slept with him the night before. The only thing worse would have been a greeting by chest bump.
No. Cease was criminally insane from birthday shots, and not a lot of women want to go home from the bar with a guy who wants to "snuggle but keep it strictly professional".
Could have been worst, could have seen me bent over biting her carpet while her son was inside me, i think i would have respnded with "i was just trying to be quiet"
Not sure if you're still doing the whole "sleeping with only one person" thing but if you're not we should sleep together when I get back in town tonight.
I fell asleep while studying last night and woke up smelling like whiskey and sex... words can not describe how confused I am
Yes, let me tell you about the time I was forcibly locked in a bathroom when my ex-girlfriend was having a bad shroom trip.
He got in a shopping cart outside of home depot and insisted we push him down a flight of stairs. For science.
Was looking through my phone and saw that drunk me took a tit pic in the Denny's bathroom..
You’ll (maybe) appreciate that I picked at my ingrown hair again. Quarantine updates are getting BLEAK.
Her hand jobs are magic. They smell like vanilla and awesomeness. She made me forget how to walk
I’m a little confused...we were told by Cheeto Jesus and his minions multiple times that we would stop hearing about coronavirus the day after the election and, yet, I am still hearing about coronavirus. Is it possible they lied to us again?!?
Randomize
