I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
just watched the video of me leading you with a trail of french fries.
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
Guess who left Professor Cunt on their paper by accident?
Im on my period and I feel like I'm going to die. The only thing that can make this tolerable is for you to eat me out in the shower. Please. I'll do anything.
Commuter bitches be judging your sister and her bag fulla wine. It's a motherfucking rosé, bitch!
Like what did he say to his host family? The girl I causally sleep with on the weekends is coming over?! And they thought "well lets feed her dinner"
I tried to twerk on a barn in 3 inch heels at a party last night and nose dived into mud. These were all new friends. I'm probably not allowed back. Cool.
Just assume that every drink in that house has alcohol in it.
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
please don't
On my way to return shoes I bought so that I can afford to buy a pregnancy test. Is this adulthood?
my ex finally blocked me on all social media and tbh I'm only pissed because his roomate just got a puppy
Just stay awake and booze cruise it to class. How are you a senior and have never went to class drunk? No excuses, I have a better gpa.
Im riding the bus with beer in one hand and chapagne in the other. I love weddings.
the funny thing was, all i remember was a liter of vodka and going to oneonta for the night. then 2 weeks later bam, i get a letter banning me from campus for the next 4 years. awesome convorsation with my dad to wake up to.
Randomize
