I think scott just propositioned me for sex
she needs to learn to take compliments like she takes dicks.
you left him a drunk voicemail of you singing speechless by lady gaga balling your eyes out
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
It was so delicious I was introducing it to people. Guy from my psych class was like "This is my girlfriend, Erica," and I was like, "This is my milkshake, Oreo."
Are we responsible for the snowmen doing it doggy-style in my front yard?
We left live chickens on the basement slip n slide. Good luck finding your car keys
Just the amount of girls he locked himself in my room woth says your gonna have to take a cab bro. I don't think he's going anywhere
He just had a handle of vodka with ice in it yelling at people hot august night mother fuckaaaaa and was pouring it on his face
Mistakes were made. Hot mistakes that I want to make again. But tapping your employee is def a mistake. Esp in front of two other employees.
Yeah no problem. What are blow job angels for anyways
Should I take a fireball shot or brush my teeth?
I really need to get a comfy set of masturbating shoes
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
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