Ninja stars and alcohol are a bad combo
I think I have swimmer's ear. From his tongue.
im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
..i think i can hear you losing your virginity
mom and dad are asleep. time to fish my half-full bottle of wine out from under my bed and give this christmas visit a pick-me-up.
"half-full" seems a little optimistic for the turn your night is taking.
Remember when we pinky swore we'd never feel hungover alone...
She just had to change the song on the radio cause I was tap dancing on her windshield
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
Just woke up from a dream where I had lesbian sex with myself (a clone of me)... Take that, Freud!
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
I don't have any soul left to be crushed.
Next time I will hook the Xbox before I get high I spent 30minuts thinking I was playing the Simpsons game when it was in reality a tv episode
I'm no longer puke free since 2013 am I.
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
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