Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
He kept saying the best defense against a lion is to punch it in the throat.
you told grandpa to call you daddy
you yelled "who's job is it to keep me from breaking shit" and then immediately ripped off the molding as you fell down the stairs.
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
hey. so did i get tied up by a jumprope last night?
It's like you are the superhero of getting jizzed on
She wanted to roleplay. Apparently you be snow and i'll be a plow wasn't an option
he drank all my beer while i was at work and passed out on my couch, when i got home he was out cold and my room mates pig was licking him. they seemed peaceful, so i took 20 bucks from his wallet and left again.
You forget how awesome toilet paper is until you have to wipe your ass with a piece of notebook paper...
I can't believe I ever hated her sister or friends. They got her some sexy sexy ass lingerie for the honeymoon. I think I love them bitches
I'm on the same pooping schedule as a professor I've never had. He now says what's up to me in the hallway
I think I've been inadvertently participating in a contest to see how many times I can show up to work hungover in my first year of teaching. And I'm the only participant. Not sure if I'm winning or losing.
Tent sex on an air mattress requires balance and flexibility. Not for the faint of heart
She got up, grabbed me a box of gushers told me to start eating, and immediately gave me the best head I've ever gotten.
Randomize
