Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
How did your new apartment party go last night?
I'm really happy i have a bigger bathroom to puke in.
Received world's greatest BJ while in a planetarium. Was seeing stars while seeing stars.
Even after projectile vomiting watermelon on the beach, it still sounds appetizing.
You did a strip tease for the toilet.
I just had a full choir singing the phrase pudding cup in my head. Too. Stoned.
I have no idea how I got home or why I am naked but I assume I owe you a thank you...
I had 800 mg of ibuprofen 2 b vitamins and I'm pounding water like I'm trying to win a hazing
I've discovered the best way to avoid rehab is to not fuck fat chicks when your drunk, therefore delaying regrets and rock bottom
your the Dr. Phil in my life
Today is an unchanging day
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
I know. It was just so disappointing. I almost made it. And now the "when's the last time you peed your pants" clock has restarted. Lol
Im wearing black today mourning the orgasm i couldn't get this morning :(
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
let me wake up, find my pants, and find out where i am tommorow and ill get back to you on that
Randomize
