Hey when I die alone will you come by often enough so that my cats don’t eat my face?
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
i got turned down by a girl after she saw how big my penis was and she said "thats not goin in me"
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
All i remember as you were making ramen is that you kept slurring "i like you as a color"...
Does Vicodin go better with white or red wine?
he handed me my panties in front of my date. turns out he wasn't that mad.
At the ER, will you come pick me up... Had an allergic reaction, wanted to see if I could eat a peanut without dying... Do you how bad this is evolutionary, I would have died back in the days of survival of the fitest by now
woke up next to the new dishwasher. set the record for banging a new employee to 6 hours...i should be a professional sexual predator
You know you're doing college wrong when you have to bail your RA out of jail
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
i want to platonically make out with them, platonically. in the back of this minivan
I don't care what you say about him, his cock is the stuff dreams are made of.
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
Randomize