Its about time the women of america have a president they can masturbate to again
dude sorry but u no that when a guys 'likes' ur pic on facebook it only means he was just jacking off to it.
he kept refering to his penis as the "eternal sunshine"
Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
My mom just used the words "ice cunt". It may be an interesting day afterall.
Upside of a two-day migraine: thanks to a prominent "E" in the middle of every pill, I think we can totally pass off Excedrine Migraine as ecstasy to stupid, drunk freshman. This is totally going to happen. That entrepreneurship course is paying off.
I wish you could take over my body and feel what my nipple feels like right now
I'm watching a man in drag spread food products on his face my life is spiraling out of control.
Today's been pretty great, I went and bought the new Batman for the sole purpose of masturbating to Bane
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
After her AA meeting, she was on the phone with her mom, and when she said, "they're making me start over with Step 1," I quietly sang, "cut a hole in the box".
You can't talk like Dr. Evil to me five minutes after the greatest orgasm of my life.
Is this really the life I've chosen for myself?
Give me one good reason why I should go with you.
Free beer.
..pick me up at 8.
i let a mormon finger me. i don't ever want to be that drunk again.
Randomize
