Only now do I see "not intended for use on skin" warning. Wonderful. But hey, my dick smells like magic marker.
wow... just woke up to find out that the OJ we used in my bong last night was poured back into the carton
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
Im on the side of I-10 covered in sweat, cookie dough, hollandaise sauce, onion gravy, and ground beef wondering how my life I ended up here
Since he's sober and out of jail, he acts like we are the worst people on Earth. Fuck him, the only acceptable time in life to do coke is the early twenties. He won't take that from us.
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
Lesson of the night: never take shots out of a bottle you found under a couch in a frat house. I have no idea where I am
IT'S LINGERIE PURCHASED FROM A FLEA MARKET, THE ONLY THING IT'S GOING TO BE POSITIVE FOR IS A TEST FOR HIV
On the bad side I puked, but on the bright side I puked lettuce which was a new experiance
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
wrestling a boy for fruit? sounds suspiciously like foreplay...
also somebody did cough syrup and i was really worried but i couldn’t express why properly so i was like MACKLEMORE SAYS NO
My general physician told me i have the emotional capacity of a 2 year old, While he refilled my xanax prescription. That's service!
I'd rather have snapchat than feelings.
Why did I wake up with a skeleton in my bed? Is it from the lab?
Oh crap, that's where it ended up. Yeah, don't ask.
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