We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
I love being friends with rich people. I get laid by association.
i love how you can even make your typing come across bitchy
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
he said 'i want to be the peanut butter to your jelly, just without the crust' and then tried to take me shirt off
couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school
I don't want the last thing I hear while alive to be Jesse's Girl
They kept trying to slap each other but they were poring beer onto their hands first referring to it as their baby powder
my roommate just said she thinks she got a flashback or some memory of me getting hit by a car.
Dude where are you? I've been here an hour and all I've done is get head from a random in the stairwell.
Please don't call my dad a fuckpuppet, I feel like that would be awkward to explain later.
WE HAVE TO LEAVE. I HAVE HAD SEX WITH WAY TOO MANY PEOPLE IN THIS BUS STATION.
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
I FOUND A VIBRATOR IN MY BABY BROTHERS ROOM. IM FREAKIN OUT MAN ITS BIGGER THEN MINE
put it back and chill out ok
NO FUCK HES 15 WHO EVEN SOLD HIM THAT HES A BABY
Randomize
