return my video game
you kept thanking chef boyardee for having pull tab cans
He told the cop he was underage, handed the cop his ID, and the police report read "I then informed the suspect that he was not, in fact, underage"
Climbing out Mr. Friday night's bathroom window. He thinks I'm puking. Be on state st. with the getaway car and if you could bring me a shirt and some advil that'd be dandy.
So proud. See you in five. I've got coffee.
I walked in and all four of you were covering your heads under the blanket singing waterslides in unison.
Because it was 5am and I had a shitty mixed drink and I was threatening to put my balls in your face.
Not the worst first impression I've experienced.
Ugh I can't even look at alcohol this weekend, my body needs to heal.
You want to get day drunk this afternoon and watch these guys build a house across the street?
Sangria Sundays can't keep happening. Even my second grade students know I'm hungover. Benji even gave me his oreos its that bad
Well its official, I'm into significantly freakier sex than even I thought possible.
When he opened the car door the whole thing fell off. Even that can be forgiven via his monster cock.
it's the amount of time you spend on preventing me from puking that really cements this friendship
Can you please help mom and dad? Theyre trying to figure out Skype, and its like 2 cavemen finding fire.
Hypothetically speaking how does one remove a lamp that they hypothetically superglued to the ceiling?
Acetone nail polish remover, and you lied about studying last night didn't you?
Oh definitely.
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
Randomize
