hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
My bed smells like naked
Haha. At least it doesn't smell like herpes
so after all day drinking, we went to an all u can eat crab place and i was going from table to table surveying the crowd if they though the crab i was carrying around looked like the flying dog from never ending story...what the hell is wrong with me?
For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
I just got wrote up for "repeatedly smelling like alcohol"
That was long passed due.
you thought you were invisible so you started narrating your actions.
He came on me while singing crank dat like soulja boy, fuck our sex life has reached a whole new level of low
But life isn't just all about getting drunk & eating chicken strips.
Just woke up and my doorbell is on my nightstand... the fuck?
I was woke up by the fucking Star Spangled Banner this morning. I sat up in bed and put my hand over my naked heart. I was so confused
On Friday, can we drink like its Civil Wars times and the doctor's coming to saw off our gangreen infected legs?
Just watched my first Christmas porn of the year. Def have the spirit now
His mom came while we were asleep naked and started asking me about my plans after high school... Is that even a thing.
Just found out the last guy I hooked up with is being held in a federal prison under suspicion of stealing 175k.
I am mildly hung over. Decided pants are very unnecessary right now.
Randomize
