i might have gotten away with it if "don't tase me bro!" wasn't the first thing i said when i rolled down my window.
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
The liquor store manager told us to drink responsible as we checked out and we laughed to his face. Like we're buying karkov at noon, responsibility is out of the question
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
Just heard the girl at the bar cuss her bf out and order a long island ice tea. Going to give it 5 min then I'm going in. See you on the other side.
I can't figure out if I'm dying from all of the booze still in my system, or from the cement wall.
He purred while eating me out. HE PURRED AND I LIKED IT.
I learn from experience and I experienced what it would be like to completely lose my mind and then wake up with a stab wound.
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
Holy high batman
The hairdryer was like a fuckin obstacle course
I love when groups of boys part so I can walk through. It's like a red sea of penises, and I am their Moses.
Odd start to the day - the FBI just showed up at my apartment.
She is carving a little coffin out of some wood for her hamster that died. I'm flying home tonight.
I hope Trump leaves Planned Parenthood alone for at least another month. The week got away from me. #whorelando
Everyone got an underage but her
How'd she get out of it?!
She hid in the FUCKING DRYER
Randomize
