I feel like death. And death is wearing a fleece blanket as a dress. And is seriously contemplating wearing this to go get something to eat.
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
our night together was a product of my beer goggles and jennifer aniston-like desperation.
She tried to ditch the cab before she payed but she forgot to grab her shoes and wake me up
Dad's drunk, trying to hook me up with a 43yo, and keeps saying one and done. Mom is on the verge of tears and disowning us. You missed a good birthday dinner.
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
I'm all about sex. But even I know there will be a time to retire my junk. And that will be my 40th birthday, or whenever I'm hideous
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
If you do that, i will make all sorts of uncomfortable comments about my nipples being soft
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
This is the second girl that said she wanted to fuck me while wearing a clown nose. Fuck online dating
I have got to move on from this "sleeping with every drug dealer I meet" phase.
Remember when I puked into a mesh garbage can in the middle of a meeting and told the clients it was "morning sickness"?
hahah yep
Well the are flying back here, it's been like 10 months, should I frame fake baby pics in my office?? Or too much?
So much for no-infidelity-fridays....
she is currently in the shower drinking a beer and dancing to a song called "the penis song" my roommate is cooler than yours
Randomize
