Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
how the fuck did you end up in georgia? you were here at my party dry humping some chick 2 hours ago
so you mean to tell me that there is no way you can get me?
it was all downhill after the free blackjack taco
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
Pretty sure he sprained my tongue. This is why you don't hook up with gingers.
You found me in the back room alone eating someone else's whole birthday cake with my hands then asked me if you could join.
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
If you can find a Canadian Lesbian to have pity sex with me, let me know.
there's an entire drinking game devoted to nobody liking her face
Sext: Bring me pancakes from the midnight breakfast gathering please
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
Video footage says last night I reincarnated as stripper Shania Twain... Man, I feel like a (slutty) woman.
Idk if I should be worried or amused that my autocorrect changes the word STD to DTF.
Last night at a party someone grabbed my ass so I just fucking punched them in the face then went home and ate a frozen pizza
Randomize
