My BOSS just pulled out a box of Christmas stuff labeled reefs.
We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
plan d- we get drunk, go see that Justin Bieber movie and freak out 13 year old girls.
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
You got called a pussy at a party with a slow cooker, you can't let that shit slide
I feel that my cleavage set an unattainably high bar for 2013.
You're cock blocking me from my own boyfriend. What kind of shit is that?
Guess what I'm doing tonight? Tacos and strip chess.
He kept singing Happy Birthday to himself, yelling at the bouncers for not letting him in, and telling them his "father will hear of this." He was like a drunken Scottish Draco Malfoy.
I woke up hugging a box of cheerios that had "wonder woman" written in sharpie on it. So much for a sober night.
I think that all guys are assholes, some of them just have less assholeish qualities that we accept in our lives and that we can look past enough to deal. They have to be a pretty special asshole.
Goddamn it. Hes got me addicted to his penis
By the way I can not feel my vagina. It's like it's asleep. What the hell did you do?
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
Randomize
