Yeah we had sex for the first time last night and all the text he sent me afterwards said was “heh”
what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
I just found a dead bug in my nose. if that's the worst thing up there im considdering myself lucky.
you ever fart during an orgasm? feels like u just lost 10 pounds
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
Roman Polanski is more welcome at my daughter's birthday party than you are at that bar
He did a double fist pump when he discovered the Magnums fit and skipped back towards the bed.
Talking about the game in the closet with a banana wearing sunglasses.
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
We should search craigslist for porches to sublet.
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
I spent most of my night in the men's room eating popcorn on the garbage can conversing with strangers pissing
He put his burrito in the bag with his dildo.
Having Father’s Day on Pride weekend is always so awkward. “Hey dad just calling to say I love you.” While I’m navigating my way through a pop up pool at a bar riding a penis floatie. Happy Father’s Day.
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
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