I'm surprised I didn't puke tonight
I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
You dont understand he had a split tongue thats bucket list worthy.
shes laying on the floor in a bowl of salsa with her pants half off and she's crying... i dont know what to do...
You stood next to him taking HUGE gasps of air in an attempt to second hand smoke his cig because you didn't have one...
I'm pregaming for my hair cut. Working two jobs definately taught me how to use my time wisely...
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
Its okay I walked into your house, searched for my wallet in your purse, and took a shot of Tequilia all without eye contact, right?
Listen to my proposal.... I feed you crackers while I fuck you ever so gently.
lesson learned. Never drop acid before a trip to the aquarium. Sounds awesome, is actually terrifying.
I would totes reciprocate the nip pic, but I'm sick with a piece of tissue shoved up one of my nostrils and I'm just not feeling that ambitious. Sorry.
The hot streak continues..if life was NBA jams i would be "on fire" right now
If sending nudes to tinder boy is considered functional then yes.
I threw a lamp at you?
Yes, yes you did.
Awesome
Randomize
