I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
Fixing to yell "you're too hot for her" at a Gerard butler look alike. There is absolutely no way this is going to end well...
You threw up? Were you ladylike while you did it? I'm wagering that you were. Like a Disney princess. Like a "Puke Me Pretty" Barbie.
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
Yeah, first time I've shit my pants in my twenties... I'm thinking about putting it on my Facebook timeline
I was jumping over your garbage can screaming "Im a snow cat!!" ..Who wouldn't want to see that?
We bought a pool from walmart at 2am...and to make matters even more white trash we headed to Applebee's for half off appetizers and corona-ritas
Hey, taking organic chemistry means no one is allowed to tell you you're partying too hard.
i mostly like you because you have a nice nose and that's an important trait to pass on to my future children
Did you put Adderal in the fishtank in the lobby? The fish are acting like Olympic sprinters. Asshole.
There comes a point where there's just condoms and old mcdonalds in your garbage can and you can't tell if you've won or lost.
Did you fill my inhaler with tequila?
Yeah, so?
My bed smells like the plague
If you can endure a laser on the butthole, you can endure a wax on the butthole. Those are words to live by.
Randomize