It was like a Michael Bay sized explosion located in my pussy.
There comes a time in every man's life where he has to shit in a catbox to prove a point.
I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
She wouldn't go home with me cause I forgot her name. I didn't realize it would matter after she danced with her vagina on my face
Did you write "I hope this gives you aids" on my box of capn crunch?
We had sex and then he fed me pie. This is the best friends-with-benefits situation ever.
Most awkward car ride ever. Kid in the front seat was bawling, 2 in the backseat were ready to fight, and I was giving the last kid a handie. This needs to stop happening to us.
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
I like dinosaurs. I like penises. It's kind of a win win
He had the same tone in his voice and look in his eyes that he gets when he says UFOs aren't real.
Is there a tactful way to ask "how are your balls?" Or do I just ask point blank
Idk I've taught my 18 month old how to say nipple so kids aren't all bad
My moral compass kept pointing to his penis.
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
FINE I guess I'll just drink regular coke like a PLEBIAN.
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