a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
Great. There's a birthday party at work today. Now I can stand around and feel uncomfortable for an hour.
I'm buying this stripper a house, I don't care what her name is.
Thursdays are my worst days
but now we sippin champagne when we thirstay?
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
Theres a dude at this concert at the urinal double fisting beers, taking drinks from both while simultaneously pissing euerywhere. He is my hero
i wasn't about to bring her gummy handcuffs to her father's funeral
You turned to me, winked, whispered "man the harpoons" and walked out with the fat chick
It would just be icing on the fucked up cake we're baking, if he got me pregnant.
Oh and apparently something happened that was related to "THIS IS SPARTA" but no one will tell me what I did.
So I'm going to blame my boobs hurting on that.
he walked up looked at my boobs then looked at my eyes then looked at my boobs again smiled and said "can I get you and the girls a shot "
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
I'm shrooming way too hard to deal with your bullshit at this particular point in time
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
Is it a bad thing when vodka doesn't taste like vodka anymore?
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