I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
i think my mom would be mad if i was pregnant. last time i was she grounded me for a week.
For his 21st I'm getting a fancy hotel that way he can at least sleep in a nice bathtub
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
Well he has a girlfriend. So I told him that I wanted to have sex way more than I wanted to be a decent human being.
We could supplement the Tour with Edward Andre-hands. Because 40s are for the 99%.
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
I need an adult. someone more adult than my current state
My night started to turn around the time I started calling her a "raggedy cunt".
Somehow she got that I meant it as a term of endearment.
I gave him a bunch of ideas to use to spice up their sex life. Say what you will, I am the best 'other' woman ever!
you were caressing the jar of pickles then you looked down and whispered to them "I want you inside me"
I walked in on him jerking it to videos of UFC fighters. The most awkward part: he didn't stop when I walked in.
I just got through airport security with 5 grams of weed in my back pocket. Either I deserve a metal or the government is slacking
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