What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
She announced her abortion via fbk
The girl behind me at the dollar store said couldn't wait to get her permit, then requested a pregnancy test. God I love being home.
please come get me his dick is out. i'm sitting on his couch and his dick is out. come now
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
please dont pick me up from the airport dressed like a terrorist.
I'm in his phone as "nashville blowjob" he also has "cleveland blowjob" "vegas blowjob" etc. i'm okay with this.
Fuck you come back. The old guy next to me is complementing me on my great choice of ring fingers,
If you can find a Canadian Lesbian to have pity sex with me, let me know.
Commuter bitches be judging your sister and her bag fulla wine. It's a motherfucking rosé, bitch!
The waitress at the airport bar just asked me if I wanted a "to go" beer, hahahahaha OF COURSE I WANT A TO GO BEER.
he said "be careful" then handed me a cheezit...
You were passed out in the OutBack Bowl Shrimp costume and when we asked you wtf happened you just said On Wisconsin.
I'm at a first year old's birthday party and a midget dressed as a cop just showed up. Word is we're going to toss and bowl with him. Updates to come.
He said I was so drunk and high that I had a conversation w/ his goldfish. The video shows me clearly conversing as if talking to a person w/ pauses in conversation and everything
Randomize
