If a cop asks you "Where do you go for fun?", it's not a pick up line...especially if he just pulled you over.
were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
You've got the short couch unless you find some girl to take you home
Challenge accepted.
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
I totally just potholed and almost crashed while trying to lick salsa off my boob.
No idea. I woke up in the middle of the night to you drooling and gnawing on my arm. Then you rolled over, punched the air 4 times, then proceeded to talk about your hair in your sleep.
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
My new year's resolution was to squirt this year. I only have four months left. Help.
Fyi your toilet is not contaminated. We'd have to scissor pretty hard to pass what I got.
"Stranger danger aquaman" were the last words i remember. help me.
I may or may not have just let Ash Ketchum capture my wild Pikachu in a parking lot.
PLEASE HELP ME THE AMERICANS ARE YELLING ABOUT TURKEY, I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO
I might have to quit marching band. It's affecting my drinking schedule
While finding our clothes afterwards he says..."So do we like have to talk after this?"
Found your brother. He was passed out in the tub holding a bottle of Shatto milk wearing nothing but his tighty-whities.
Randomize
