I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
PS- I just stirred my mimosa with a slice of bacon
Then you started screaming that this was the first time you did e and that you had a 4.8 gpa, that was right before you almost suffocated between that one girl's tits.
I think I just used lyrics from the Sister Sister theme song to let a guy down easy...
If I ever die and svu has to come to my murder scene make sure they know I don't wear underwear always so it might not be as bad as they think
But the ghost of his schlong past haunts you
It's official, there's a sex tape of me floating around some high school
A surprise thumb up the ass and I'm wide awake. She was right, no need for caffine pills I could fight ninjas now.
I think Vodka is my favorite. Everything else ties for second.
It was a fight. Me vs nature and drunkenness. And nature won. Big time.
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
My one regret (beside the inevitable shit storm that followed) is that now I can't fuck his cute friend.
Which sister was it? The one I accidentally hit when my shoe flew off or the one I ate candy off of when we were high?
He started talking about getting a puppy together. So of course I went down on him later
i can believe you didnt get any, i was wing-girling the shit out of him
all you did was repeatedly scream GET IT IN
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