i was just at lovers lane looking for gifts for a bachelorette party.....with my mom
Bigbird is at the bar Im at. whats her name
We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
So apparently vaginal secretions are not covered under water damage insurance for my cell phone
His facebook status is an owl city song. I'm so glad i didn't end up fucking him.
i'm glad we're now at the level of friendship where we can comfortably discuss the quality of our shit
you know, even black out drunk I can always remember the exact point where I should have stopped drinking.
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
I definitely hasselhoffed a taco bell burrito on my kitchen floor in front of my dad and little brother.
i should do something illegal before my birthday. as of thursday im old enough to go to jail.
how many lesbians have to have their hearts broken before they realise I am not that kind of DJ
my roommate had a few special brownies and wrapped my purse and one of my shoes and left them under the tree for me...
Can you please come and collect your boss off of my kitchen floor.
I'm not going to say what I did. You're smart enough to figure it out. But I did it. And you owe me 20$
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
Randomize
