Her vagina smelled like hockey gear.
One of her kids, Dakota I think, got stuck in a ceiling fan and she had a fit, thats when she found the penis hat.
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
I sang again at the bar lastnight I don't think alanis morrset knew when she wrote you outta know that the drunk version was going to be go fuck yourself Josh and Chelsea. I love $2 wells.
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
We also had a full on debate about how realistic and useful teleportation and time travel would be...and only used Twilight Zone episodes as "scientific evidence"
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
Worst walk of shame man. They had a fire drill at 7am, had to walk out of her all girl dorm wearing my Everday I'm Hustling sweater
Look, you don't know disfunction until you've sat on the john taking a shit and crying while totally sober.
Apparently "Do you want me to ruin your day now or later?" is not a good way to tell someone you're pregnant and it's theirs.
I just ate broccoli before drinking. Does that make me a responsible adult?
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
I'd like to know who hasn't seen my tits tonight.
No, I told him I was busy again this weekend. Eventually he’ll learn. Plus, absence makes the cock grow harder
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