ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
At a bar where three women in denim shorts are debating techniques and skillsets for wrangling goats. You stay classy Delaware.
i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
Dude stop singing. Your life is not an episode of fucking glee
i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
The more I hate his personality, the more I love his penis.
I swiped a lunchable and a gatorade from my one night stand's fridge, does it count as a date now since a meal was included?
you know it's the perfect hook up when you don't have any friends in common with his girlfriend on facebook.
Just now remembered singing Trashy Women at the reception. Not karaoke, just sang along with the mic I stole from the DJ. All while still in my dress drinking champagne from the bottle
So don't be alarmed when you go into your bathroom, he's sleeping in the tub with your brothers dinosaurs. also I'll clean up the sticky floor later. (you don't wanna know)
This may be the alcohol talking, but I'm pretty sure I know Spanish now
Hung out near hay bales in sweaters then she gave me a pumpkin spice pop rocks bj. That was so freakin' seasonal.
Somehow my family started talking about sex toys at breakfast.
I know right? It's like he knows how to pleasure me better than I do myself... He's like a prophet of sex
AND ONCE AGAIN THE HENNESSEY MAKES ME A SUPER SAIYAN
Oh for fuck's sake, is that why the couch is in the pool???
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