im letting my talent of no gag reflex go to waste
I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
Why is your signature on my underwear?
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
Still trying to wash and scratch the glitter off of my dick. That stripper should be banned.
You yelled "hold my dick" before you tackled the guy away from the dj and two random girls moved to actually hold it, then argued about it. I want that whore aura!
Important update! My next door neighbours have a canoe. Repeat: THEY HAVE A CANOE! We are having sex in it before this summer is over.
In the middle of blowing him I looked at him and said "Your so old..." and then continued. I need to stop drinking.
Could we try to replay the decision making process whereby only you and I bought and drank a keg this weekend? Because there were some fundamental flaws!
So do you want to be the old guy picking up a girl in a mini skirt who may be slightly buzzed before noon from college, or shall i walk over?
Dude we need to hang out soon. I'm in the mood to get arrested again.
Sorry for throwing up in your humidifier last night, I thought it was some sort of electrical garbage can
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
Bro i just made a pipe out of a mechanical pencil and the top to an eye drop bottle. Does that make me some kind of pot god?
He passed out while I was riding him but stayed hard long enough for me to orgasm. He definitely earned the blow job I’m going to wake him up with in the morning!
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