Idk man, it felt like my skin was a suit and I could feel it zipping up my side and up to my mouth. And then my head felt like a ventriloquist dummy's head, with the jaw thing..it was freaky, dude
You think that's a metaphor for anything, champ?
Shut the hell up.
dude she wont stop talking about little people big world...she said my penis looked like zach roloff and took a picture with her phone?
Missing a small section of hand. Hope your night is going better
plus shes a stripper, ive been with strippers, if you fuck this up your penis will never forgive you
Is it bad to get into the ocean at night? i always thought sharks hated the smell of vomit after drinking
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
I have to stop drunkenly making out with guys just because they're tall or have a beard.
I have too much respect and admiration for my dick to put it into a situation where he could possibly be killed
Stop trying to get a gf and raw dog some forest beasts like sasquatch
I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing
"I made out with someone too, but then he tried to fuck and I played dead"
You ate my pie without asking. So don't get butt hurt if I send you link to plus size clothing stores.
When you wake up and wonder why your bleeding and it feels like you jumped into a ceiling fan, dont worry. Ill explain it all when I wake up.
Remind me later when I want to buy more drinks that there's a 20 in my bra
just saw a kid waiting at the door of the stairs for the elevator. there is no elevator in this building. get on his level.
Randomize
