At one point during the moaning he reminded me of Forrest Gump
i was like a deer caught in headlights with its coke-dick hanging out
I'm at a party with that guy you made out with on new years. He remembers your name!
i would think by now you'd realize that my penis does whatever the fuck it wants and i have no control over the situation
I just want you to know that i just realized your the only friend i dont feel fat around.
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
He blew a .19 and then slurred "well I did have some rum cake earlier today officer".
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
I woke up hugging a box of cheerios that had "wonder woman" written in sharpie on it. So much for a sober night.
He pulled over in the Compass Bank parking lot so I could dry-heave, but I decided I couldn't vomit there because "I bank here."
I emptied a Vyvance capsule into my coffee pot last night and set the auto start. Pretty sure I've been drinking meth all morning
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
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