thank god random hookups don't end with college. happy birthday, america.
Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
dude. FULL moustache. it was like getting head from Tom Selleck
and then when she swallowed her birth control with a shot of vodka and looked in my direction, i knew it was time to go.
During the middle of giving him head, he flashes his phone and says "I like to watch."
Your clothes are in washers 2,3 and 4. I arranged by darks, whites, then frat... I'm not even joking
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
I call it my summer of slut; except summer lasts from May until December. It's been incredibly successful
You missed a lot. I drank contact solution thinking it was water, vodka thinking it was water and some unidentified substance that reminded me of pine sol thinking it was water..
Why is it that every study session with you turns into a hunt for drugs?
Is there a word in the English dictionary for impressed, yet disgusted?
I think the word you're looking for is flabbergasted.
sometimes you just gotta eat tacobell at 2am and cry all your feelings out
Just stalked the girl I hooked up with last night's boyfriend. He seems nice, I approve.
My penis is lonely
So is my ring finger
Randomize
