If the Four Horseman of the Apocalypse gang banged each other and had a kid, it would look like the creature I woke up next to this morning.
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
His roommate just snorted a line of Smirnoff off the desk. I could really fit in here.
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
I'm not a horrible person, I just see what everyone chooses to politely ignore.. And occasionally say it aloud whilst deeply intoxicated.
I walked around with red solo cups on my feet, weeds tied around my neck and a tree in my hand
The night before doing drugs with your bro is like Christmas Eve that made love to thanksgiving that made love a virgin.
I woke up in some kids room and he introduced me to his friends at breakfast as "Monica" so I just went with it.
I might as well just sew it shut at this point.
You're wasting your dick. It needs to be bestowed upon the masses.
IT'S LIKE LOOKING INTO GOD'S VAGINA!!!!
how do you know everyone's mad at you?
I just woke up feeling shameful
wow bdsm is so cute
Little girl was fucking around on the train and completely ran her head into a pole. Totally burst out laughing as she cried. Her mom was not amused. I don't think I should be a Mom. EVER.
HILY FUCK HES HERE I HAVE MONISTAT IN ME HE SUPRISED ME
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