Who said anything about talking that was a booty call
Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade.
I had my own version of the Hangover last night. I woke up to a disassembled Christmas tree, shit on the futon, and a hamster in the bathroom with a necklace on that said "Feed Me Bitch." I don't own a hamster. I don't know what I drank last night, but I want to do it again.
I just gave head in the laundry room on campus. He said it was one of the best moments in all of history. Take that, neil armstrong.
no more everclear, i just stood next to the toilet and peed my pants. then went back to the party soaking wet.
They ran out of ice at the party, so I fixed my drink with frozen broccoli....the show must go on!
She described me as " a caterpillar of adorable quietness that exploded into a slutty butterfly" She definitely nailed it there
Walk of shaming into my apartment. No one to clap me in. Come home!
It was the easiest thing I've ever done. 3am she walked into my room, saw my Buffalo Bills blanket, said go bills and got naked.
Like he was trying to be sexy but he had shit taste in porn so i left
you would have been so proud of how classy i just looked at the pharmacy with my $10 off plan b coupon. so resourceful.
He pulled out the guitar, sat in tub, and took requests while she puked her brains out in the toilet. I think he loves her.
Taking a walk while tripping face during Halloween time was a bad idea. I started crying bc I was so scared and hide in the parks playground.
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
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