somehow in between the body shots the bong hits and trying to convince the 7-11 lady to let me fill up my vodka bottle with cherry slurpee. i misplaced my car.
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
I told him next time he kisses her to remember where that mouth has been...
How'd that go?
Hes on his way with a baseball bat...
So thanks to the xanax and vodka memory erasering combo i wake up only to reopen a picture of some very familiar balls
Just transferred the sun chips from that obnoxious Eco-friendly bag into a zip lock. Fuck the environment, that bag is loud.
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
Its so hard looking at my mom and pretending I'm not dying a slow death of binge drinking
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
And if it ever comes down to tax or healthcare benefits we can get married
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
Well his dad is my dentist so they've both been in my mouth.
How is your new roommate working out
We are drinking at the laundromat. And will probably have sex later. So...pretty good.
And let me tell you, getting your ass waxed is the weirdest fucking experience.
Cat needed to get out last night. Walking to the door was too much effort so I encouraged (pushed) him to leave via window.
Isn't your room on the second floor?
I don't like kids.
You were literally holding a baby 5 minutes ago
I like them before they learn to speak and after they learn to think.
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