I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
They should make Glad Forceflex condoms.
just got 3 freshman girls to makeout with each other at a toga party! score!
why is this not a picture message?!?!
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
He had a 99.9% chance of getting laid...until he started cutting down the frat's volleyball nets with his pocket knife.
I'm going to practice throwing things up the the air and catching them between my boobs, because that seems like a cool party trick.
So apparently using the emergency exit of the bar as a bathroom is frowned upon in this establishment...
You puked on the bar then proceeded to walk out. I told the bartender some girl walked up, puked and left and he gave me a free drink. Hope you got home safe.
I was jerking him off and in two seconds he went from "oh yeah that feels good" to "what day is Thanksgiving again?" and then back again. Like wtf.
Apparently I was drunk enough to call he police station and ask if there was a problem with me.
I'm in my onesie attempting to spoon-feed myself cold soup. I'm playing freeze tag with my hangover. My hangover's winning.
I've never been so drunk at home. I just sat on the toilet playing with toilet paper for ten minutes, I almost made a paper crane.
passed out on bart again and decide to bike home. biked thru a goat farm of angry goats, biked on the freeway, got stopped by the cops, and sat shotgun in the squad car while the officer driving got a video on his iphone of his partner riding my bike on the freeway.
woke up on my floor using my jeans i wore out as a pillow
haha i wouldn't expect any less of you
Cockblock successful. That's for pouring nacho cheese on my flatscreen, asshole.
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