All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
Best walk of shame ever - Brown Hennesy shirt, bright blue overly large basketball shorts, stilettos from night before - ended up buying a ton of 40's and a 30 pack of coors.
Where are you?
A place I should not be.
I woke up covered in BBQ sauce. My hand had "you win" written on it. Do I celebrate?
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
Seriously? Time stamp. 2:31 AM. And I am taking self potraits with a tree. Betty Ford anyone?
I ended up in a shower with 9 people and a bunch of unopened beer last night. I think I got peed on. Hands were everywhere. We sold the peed on beer to people knocking on the hotel room door.
Wow, now I'm sad I didn't go.
I mean, once you get beat with a dildo you can't look at someone the same
It's like I'm in a vicious cycle of noncommittal penis.
It's like the god of all feather dusters, but for your vagina
It really is the softest mustache
Her desktop wallpaper is a collage of penises she fucked.
Good news. I heard back from the doctor and I don't have a liver problem.
...yet.
I know it sucks but it's just something that needs to be done though. Like shaving ur pubes or going to the dentist.
for the record, you never really realize how drunk you still are until you get on rollerskates...
I'm determined to sit on that face.
My nipples are YOUNG and they need TWISTING
Randomize
