A homeless man in dtwn SF was blasting lil wayne and singing at the top of his lungs. I kinda wanted to give him my life savings
I had the most spectatular hardon this morning. I think it was trying to reach you in Wisconsin.
taking shots each time the weatherman says Dont go out in this blizzard
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
He had me believing he was actually British until he came and used his real voice.
Remind me tomorrow to take that ball-gag out of my purse.
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
whatever the appropriate amount of shots is to consider drunken acrobatics a good idea was a few less than I actually had
there is vomit in the pocket of my dress coat. i remember thinking "this is a weird place to puke" at some point in the evening, but i dont understand how i did this.
Sexting across continents is really a perfect example of how far technology has come.
While we were having sex he asked me if I wanted to get wingstop after. I think I found my future husband.
She's really sweet and cute, but when she drinks, she becomes way too proud of her bush.
He was really cute! And I know but it's just like getting my fix ya know? He's basically a human vibrator.
We can have bacon on the roof while tanning
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