If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
she was dressed as a doctor claiming that after she was done i would have a "permaboner"
i sneezed during and he said it felt like i gave birth to his dick...then asked me to do it again.
Whatever is fine with me, as long as I am dressed in green and end up shitfaced.
i can't believe i had a foursome before a threesome
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
Hypothetically speaking, what is the proper response if one gets bitten by a most likely not rabid squirrel? Hypothetically.
I honestly can't remember your justification for putting peanut butter on your cell phone.
I have too much respect and admiration for my dick to put it into a situation where he could possibly be killed
Oooo. Can we pretend to be Amanda Bynes?
She bought wigs like Disney princesses. I want to be her.
I tried to face swap with Chuck Norris. His face was too powerful... it broke my snap chat.
When she's hammered the amount of alliteration that comes out of her mouth is amazing.
The bouncer said the club was at capacity we couldnt get in till ppl left all three of them pulled their tits out we got complimentary bottle service never under estimate women
You stole my car to go to your boyfriends. Now your parents are fucking in the next room at top volume, and I have no way to escape..thought you should know that the amount of therapy I'll be needing for this is expensive.
You're the best friend ever.
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