well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
My epitaph should read "Margaritas: she never learned"
Nicole, you can't keep coming over at 3am wanting to build igloos.
Found: medium sized pair of mens pants tucked inside my purse w/ a dry cleaners coupon in left pocket. Call if you wish to claim the coupon
I apologize for getting really drunk, taking off my shirt, bitching someone out, crying, and breaking something at your party next weekend...
Dude. It just hit me for a second time. My thumbs are huge and moving very quickly. Like stampeding buffalo...
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
I'M SO WET FOR FREEDOM
It's a gay bachelor party, it's not like dignity is to be expected
I just found a voice recording from Tanya's bachelorette party when we found you drunk in downtown being harassed by a crazy dude dressed like a clown and we rescued you. Attached is a voice recording of me interviewing you after we found you. I titled it Carlos Batman.
If you get laid dressed as my dad that makes me extremely uncomfortable
What are best friends for?
Picking your clothes up from a one night stand you had nearly 2 months ago
If God is analyzing my life right now extremely proud or dissapointed but either way I took wednesday night drinkin to new levels
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
Randomize
