Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
i wish my penis had a tongue
you went up to their shower, tripped in it, accidentally turned it on and then claimed that you like to "test everyone's showers"
there were more penises there than on chat roulette
my cabbie only has one arm...this can't be safe
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
she just came into my room, drunkenly shoved six dollars into my bra and told me to spend it on chicken wings.
is it possible that there's a used condom holding pennies in my bra? I'm so confused on what happened last night...
You just said we could build a blanket and pillow "fuck fort." Of course I'm never leaving you.
Yeah man i woke up and only had a Jimmy John's wrapper covering myself..
If it makes you feel any better about life I'm wearing yoga pants with granny panties and toms with socks cause fuck my life
Enroute to my place eta 6 mikes...estimated time until intoxicated? 45 mikes. Commence the timer.
I thought the first time I got peed on it would be by a baby...
P.s. There are few things I love more than brand new mascara and you are one of them.
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
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