a guy named alex was hitting on my friend tonight. he doesnt work on wind turbines tho.
I just spent $27 on things to pee on.
Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
I love how all these freshman girls think that they can wear what they wore last summer... freshman 15 at its skankiest
Two grown ass men just come into the bar riding humongous tricyles
yeah except there is a correlation between drinking moonshine and going blind, which kind of concerns me
WHY IS HE GONE WHEN I ACTUALLY HAVE THE AMOUT OF ESTROGEN TO HUMP A SQUIRREL?!?!
Pizza rolls are incredible. They are like sex, except I have them sometimes
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
I HAVENT SEEN A PENIS IN 5 WEEKS I REFUSE TO REMAIN CALM
I feel a little uneasy about having my grandma sleep in my bed that I've banged chicks in not too long ago... Fuckin blizzards
He's balder, I'm skinnier. I win. I. Win.
No,she came up with a new game: "Where is the most interesting place I can show Drew my asshole?"
He found out about your side hoe and still helped you try to find a lizard that got in the house
"fuck it, let's do moonshine" shouldn't be in ANYONE'S vocabulary.
Randomize
