its like his balls were made of silver and he was trying to polish the tarnish off
i mean you're really good at taking the morning after pill...so you could put that on your resume..
yeah, i think fast in a bad sitatuion and am able to react with appropriate measures
he gave me an orgasm. multiple times. the weird stuff he did in middle school is now irrelevant.
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
I'm eating cheerios out of the palm of my hand while I pee with the door open. Is this adulthood?
I FEEL LIKE I CAN TAKE DOWN A FULLY GROWN MOUNTAIN LION WITH ONLY A POINTY STICK OH MY GOD
I dont think ive ever had a drunk day betray me so hard before
I can't figure out if I'm dying from all of the booze still in my system, or from the cement wall.
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
If I ever go to Canada, I'm fucking the maple syrup out of his Canadian ass.
And then the templeton police were like "oh I remember her, yeah the blue haired girl that we picked up cause she was passed out drunk on the side of the road"
I'm glad we can *facepalm* it together over the married couple we fucked separately.
if i ever get to the point where i am moaning when i pee, please do the honorable thing and kill me.
Stop saving videos when you’re using my pornhub account!!! My girlfriend just tried to finger my butt because she thinks I’m into that
Randomize
